Exhortations, page 5
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Dear Math, Grow up and solve your own problems Love thy neighbor but pull down the shade
To prevent headache, do what the aspirin bottle says: Keep away from children Eat fruit and die
Smile if I'm paying your mortgage Prevent child abuse: obey your parents
Shirt the fur cup First pull up then pull down
Question authority Obey the cheese
Boycott corn-based ethanol fuel. An agribusiness scam we can't afford Aim low
When life gives you scurvy, make lemonade Shhhh, I'm hunting fanboys
Conserve water: Don't wash your hands Jail corporate crooks
Buy! Sell! Check engine soon
Brush my rock 'n' roll hair Stop global swining
Fewer bailouts, more firing squads Look for me on Dateline
Peel off that yellow ribbon and DO something! Stop whining and plot your revenge
Put him in the cone of shame! -dug Write hard, die free
Work harder: support the rich Cheer up! Things aren't as bad as they're gonna be
Stay in line Rise up, oh cogs who turn the gears
Love they enemies for it will totally piss them off Think outside the box (catbox)
All in favor of gun control, raise both hands Come to the light side, we have health care
Ask me about multi-level marketing! Alternatively, you could shoot me. Please. Nothing to see here, move along
Move your money Ban lunch meat. Or at least don't put it on my sandwiches
Ask your doctor for Nuthinatall. Along with proper diet and exercise, guaranteed to improve your health Spank me, it's the only way I'll learn
Relax... have a cupcake Change the channel
Lower your voice and strengthen your argument -Lebanese proverb Fund libraries not bailouts
Be kind, everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle U.S. out of the U.N., U.N. out of the U.S.
Embrace frivolity Stop worrying what people think of you. Most of them don't
More sleep, less Proust Breathe
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