Modern Thought, page 6
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Be a pessimist and all your surprises will be happy ones If you want to get to the top prepare to kiss a lot of the bottom
If a little is good, more is better, and too much is just right If you can't fix it with a hammer it's an electrical problem
The only thing we have to fear is clowns Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation
A synonym is a word you use in place of the one you can't spell Ignorance is just knowledge you didn't know you don't have
Reality: Worst game ever Work is for people who don't know how to be rich
It's not convenience food if you can't reach it from bed You can tell a lot about a person by what kind of person they are
Nothing is impossible except for the things that can't be done Medicine is the best medicine
Art is a dirty job but somebody's got to do it Nothing ever looks like the picture
In the event of a plane crash it's safest to be far away from any planes It's easier to resist temptation when you know it'll still be there later
Insomnia is nature's way of telling you to get more done You'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar. But what really works best is poo
Game, set, match = tennis. Set, match, run = arson The difference between 'I am good' and 'I am god' is either a typo or cocaine
If it ain't broke, you're not trying hard enough Adversity is easier to bear when it's someone else's
Everyone is someone's disappointment the good thing about a fatal mistake is you're certain to not make it again
Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way Nice dyslexics finish salt
Money can buy happiness if you know where to shop It's n ot hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere
Mistakes are proof that you're trying. And incompetent If we didn't have lawyers we wouldn't need them
Ah, the noble hot dog, which feeds the hand that bites it With a gun a man can rob a bank, with a bank a man can rob everybody
Beauty is only skin deep and that is quite sufficient A pessimist is alone but an optimist is two people away from a threesome
Bungee jumping is for suicidal people with commitment issues If you can't beat them, then don't use them in an omelet
A psychotic is a guy who just found out what's going on. -William S. Burroughs Corporations are people too
Naps - solving problems since forever Tomorrow is the second day of the rest of your life
Too much money is as bad as too little, and there's no such thing as just enough Some fools are hard to underestimate
There is a fine line between boredom and hunger Obsessed is how the lazy describe the dedicated
Actually, some things do taste waaay better than skinny feels One problem you can't solve by throwing money at it is being out of throwing money
Everything leaves a mark Coffee is always a good idea
Reasons are why we do things! If you have no regrets, you aren't trying hard enough
Today's greatest labor-saving device is tomorrow Happy endings are just stories that aren't over yet
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