Tribulations, page 2
Tribulations, page 1 | 2 | 3
I used to be a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired Can't sleep, the clowns will get me
I replaced my nonexistent sex life with food and now I can't even get into my own pants Ahh, I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again
Same crap different day Just tell Nemo you couldn't find him because you were getting high. He'll understand.
Of course I'm out of my mind, it's dark and scary in there! Why is there always so much month left at the end of the money?
I drank what? -Socrates My spoon is too big
Your arguments are subtly flawed I tried to child-proof the house but my kids found a way back in
Typo's happen must find a more suitable host body
When did cake learn to talk, and how does it know my name? I work for gas money
This would be funny if I wasn't clinically depressed Some days just suck
Slave to the system Why me?
This was never fun Sometimes I think I'm the only one here over 15
I was happy but you're ruining it! My psychiatrist says I'm paranoid but he's just out to get me
It's not the pants that make you look fat, it's the pastrami You are being lied to
Who to trust? My Cheerios say the Rice Krispies are crazy Sorry. You've mistaken me for someone with potential
Curse you, pizza. Why must you taste so good? I'm ashamed of what I did for a Klondike bar
I despair, therefore oh, nevermind, it doesn't matter I have a steering wheel in my pants and it's driving me nuts
You are driving me insane! There. I am insane now. My mood ring isn't a fashion statement, it's a court order
Oh-oh. Time to repress another memory The only problem with doing nothing, I never know when I'm done
My job ate my life Do something right, no one remembers. Do something wrong, no one forgets
Youth culture killed my dog Thinking makes me ill
Each day is better than the next French fries, the devil's salty fingers
I'm against protesting. I just don't know how to show it My imaginary friend filed a restraining order against me
There is no bright side Monday is a rotten way to spend 1/7 of your life
They're looting your future Chocolate makes my clothes shrink
The system will eat you So much to do, so few people to do it for me
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