Oh Those Humans, page 1

Oh Those Humans, page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4
My species disappoints me Everyone wants to shine but no one wants to polish
It's all about money No... no... I'm pretty sure that guns kill people
How can you tell someone is vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you You don't have to talk to your children about sex, somebody else will be glad to.
Closed minds always seem to be connected to open mouths Someday we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, then change the subject.
A fanatic is someone who won't change his mind and won't change the subject The only way bureaucrats ever cut red tape is lengthwise
Does the human race have a Yelp page? I want to give it a 1-star rating I feel bad for people who never go crazy
All of God's children are not beautiful. Most, in fact, are barely presentable. -Fran Lebowitz Diversity not Divisiveness
I mistrust any organization that contains people The Golden Rule: He who has the gold makes the rules
Everybody is somebody's weirdo The poor sometimes object ot being governed badly; the rich always object to being governed at all. -G. K. Chesterton
Stop expecting everyone to agree I kept reading that junk food is unhealthy, so I gave up reading
You can fool some of the people all of the time and those are the ones to concentrate on. Anyone who agrees with everything you say is either a fool or getting ready to do you ill
Maturity is overrated Introverts: We're here, we're uncomfortable, we want to go home
Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple Very few people actually care about you. Most are just curious
Three can keep a secret if two are dead -Ben Franklin Liberty and Justice for All. (Not available in all areas)
The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything, except what is worth knowing. -Oscar Wilde A sixpack is not a support group
Those who know least obey best ADHD is not a disorder, it's an evolutionary advance to meet the needs of modern technology
there aint nuthing wrong with the American educayshunal sistum Smokers are like anyone else, just not for as long
Dumb isn't cute Some find a way. Some find an excuse.
Don't overestimate the decency of the human race. -H.L. Mencken If kindness could really kill, not many lives would be in danger
It's always ourselves that we love the least Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a bat.
TV is gooder then BOOKS Giving rights to other people takes none away from you. It's not pie
Some of the worst people teach us some of the best lessons When you hold a grudge you're letting someone live rent-free in your head
Soylent Green is people, corporations are not The best way to debate something is first decide you know best then yell at the other person until they give up
The most common craving of pregnant women is to no longer be pregnant If you get home after midnight missing a shoe you're not Cinderella, you're drunk
Facts are potholes people avoid as they hurry to their opinions No telling what things some people might accomplish if they wasted less time posting motivational quotes online
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