Tribulations, page 3
Tribulations, page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4
I don't fret about the past, I'm too busy worrying about the future I can't remember what not tired feels like
I try to fight my iimpulses but they usually sucker punch me first So many rooms, so few clues what I came in for
I sleep fine at night, it's the waking up every hour that's a problem I was really good at math until 2nd grade came along
I'm disappointed by this unforeseen turn of events My life is a romantic comedy minus the romance and the comedy
I'm going out of my mind! Please hold my place til I get back Best or not, laughter is the only medicine I can still afford
I think I need a new heart All that holds me back is being not good enough and not really trying
I spend like half my life looking for things I had just a minute ago I've become addicted to psychotherapy but I don't know what to do about it
I got nothin' My swear jar has more money than my retirement account
I shaved my legs for this? This appears to be unproductive
You morning people are creating a hostile work environment for the rest of us It’s just one bucking thing after another
I’m starting to suspect my calls actually aren’t important to them Thank you, ATM fees, for letting me buy my own money
Not ready for all this Seems I picked the wrong week to be conscious
Due to circumstances beyond my control I am here The hardest part of waking up is the first 12 hours
I started a Neighborhood Watch but my neighbors called the cops on me Let's pretend this never happened
Still waiting for a level up Oh no! This is my circus and those are my monkeys
Dear Wednesday stop acting like Monday If it weren't for stress I'd have no energy at all
It seems Rock Bottom has a basement I was looking for a book to help with my hoarding problem and now I have 16,000 books
I think I just seized the wrong day I ate healthy to get in shape then I heard you have to do it more than once
No thanks, sleep, I’ll just lie here and review my regrets from 6 years ago I liked it better when Orwell was fiction
If you’re not worried, you’re not paying attention This would be funny if it weren't happening to me
My escape key isn’t working. I’m still here! One thing worse than a cold toilet seat is a warm one
Today was easy — like standing up in a hammock WTF-ing my way through life
The worst thing about mornings is morning people My lexicon of profanity is not sufficient to cope with today
I do not have ducks. Or a row. I have squirrels. In a rave. It's been lovely but I have to scream now
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