Wordplay, page 3
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They call me apathetic but I don't care If you know telekinesis please raise my hand
I love Earth's rotation It really makes my day My greatest fear is to dwell forever in obscurity -Unknown
Don't be condescending (that's when you talk down to people) A good name for a cover band would be Duvet
Stop Vandalism Who says nothing is impossible? I've done nothing my whole life!
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice It is wrong to ever split an infinitive
When you boil it all down, that's evaporation Irony is what steel is
Having written this, my participle dangled I'm not saying you're mean, I'm saying you're average
I know I'd be a great motivational speaker, but why bother? For the record, I own a turntable
I choose to believe what I was programmed to believe I love realism
I spend 300% of my time exaggerating I don't recall having a memory problem
Never second-guess yourself. Well, maybe sometimes To err is human, to arr is pirate
To prevent headache, do what the aspirin bottle says: Keep away from children Always give 100% (except when donating blood)
I have an easy way to cut carbs Drive wrecklessly
I'm so excited for gardening season I wet my plants! I just can't express how aphasic I am
The amount of sleep I usually need is ten minutes more In the event of a plane crash it's safest to be far away from any planes
I was hurt falling into an upholstery machine but I'm recovered now I don't repeat gossip so listen carefully
How is laser hair removal a thing? I don't know anybody with laser hair I can resist everything except temptation. -Oscar Wilde
People say I'm paranoid. I'm not sure who, but there are lots of them Snowmen pick their noses in the vegetab le aisle
I owe my success to my close attetion to detail If you make just one person smile, you're probably not that much fun to be around
Today is the first anniversary of a year ago I'm a social vegan, I avoid meet
Absolute zero is the coolest thing ever I need some way to remind myself to make a To-Do list
Web Designer This sticker no verb
When will carotene be out of beta? Octopi
Geology rocks but geography is where it’s at You can observe a lot by watching. -Yogi Berra
Eye like puns, the cornea the better Here's a question for all the mind readers out there
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