Internet Bumper Stickers
InternetBumperStickers.com Wordplay, page 4
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No prohibiting Dad jokes are always apparent
A hippo is really heavy. A Zippo is a little lighter Top ten reasons to procrastinate: 1.
Predictions are rarely correct, especially about the future Back in school I was voted Most Likely to Cling to Past Achievements
Please explain sleep to me because I just don't get it To me, the meaning of translucent is not quite clear
Not all math puns are bad, just sum Actually I'm quite humble. Which is quite rare in persons of my genious, wit and charism
Whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you’re happy 20% off everything
Mirror inspector is a job I could see myself doing If you suck at playing the trumpet try blowing
Butterflies are not what they used to be My weekends are in tents
This sticker is 25% funny and 85% bad at math Double negatives are a no no
I wanted to be a wizard but I never got the chants Sure, I’ll be altruistic. What’s in it for me?
I'm taking steps to avoid elevators Stop worrying about an apocalypse it’s not like it’ll be the end of the world
Age is only a number, check that, age is a word Doormats are gateway rugs
On a scale of 1 to 10 I only weigh 10 pounds A procrastinator's work is never done
My vacuum cleaner just gathers dust If you rearrange the letters in mail bag you get the carrier very angry
The label said, avoid eye contact. But, too late, I already saw it I'm not superstitious, that would be bad luck
I don’t have the words to describe how limited my vocabulary is Look left. You failed.
6 out of 7 dwarfs are not Happy A new study says you will pay attention to anything starting with “a new study says”
The sign, Employees Must Wash Hands, is wrong. It’s perfectly OK to wash your own hands (Na)16 Batman
What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot Life would be a billion times better if people stopped all the hyperbole
I haven’t slept for 4 days. That’s too long to stay asleep The 1st rule of Plagiarism Club looks suspiciously familiar
American children can be kind but German children are always kinder Just swallowed a dictionary. Now I have thesaurus throat
You say I'm addicted to brake fluid but I can stop any time Autocorrect is my worst enema
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother I love heavy metal (tuba)
Bumper Two wrongs don't make a right but three rights make a left
Everyone named Iris is 80% Irish I just ordered a chicken and an egg online. Now let’s see
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